who is this for & when is it happening?
There are two separate weekend workshops happening:
Sat & Sun 6/3 & 6/4
10am – 1pm
@ Soma Works Studio in Boise
Sat & Sun 9/16 & 9/17
10am – 1pm
@ Soma Works Studio in Boise
Cost: $125/person
You might sign up because:
- You are a person with a vulva who wants to reclaim your sexuality and understand your arousal process fully so that you can guide yourself and your partner(s) to deeper states of pleasure and connection.
- You are a person who has felt drawn towards making love to someone with a vulva and feel intimidated or unclear on what to do or “how it works”.
- You might understand the mechanics of anatomy, but you lack skills around being tuned in to your partner’s wants and needs and the art of communicating within a sexual play space what those wants and needs ACTUALLY look like.
- You are someone who makes love to women, but have felt in past experiences that you weren’t quite getting something right. Or perhaps you suspect a partner faked their orgasm.
- You feel derailed, put down, rejected, or otherwise deflated when a sexual partner offers corrective guidance to your touch. You may notice when this happens, you struggle to remain in connection with your partner and, feeling disconnected, stop all play.
- You suffer from performance anxiety when in sexually intimate play spaces with partners that take you out of your body and put you “in your head”, preventing you from being present and attuned during sexual play.
- You are in a long term relationship with a woman and have experienced dwindling intimate connection and wish to broaden your understanding of what’s possible in passionate, intimate connection.
- You want to learn how to speak the language of intimate touch: how to ask for what you want, how to receive corrective feedback graciously regarding the touch you’re giving, & how to empower your vulva-owning partner to discover for themselves what they want.
- You want to learn from a queer, woman of color, who has been a lover of other vulvas for nigh over a decade. You want to learn from someone skilled and experienced in facilitating consensual and trauma-informed containers that are deeply vulnerable, where every exercise or activity is optional and your NO’s are not only welcomed, but celebrated.
*regrettably, this workshop is focused on the genitalia of cisgender women. This is not intended to exclude anyone, but is merely the result of the facilitator's current lack of experiential knowledge in loving a trans-woman's vulva.
ethically, i don't teach what i don't practice myself.
That doesn’t mean that members of the trans community won’t benefit from this workshop, and they are DEFINITELY invited to come, if it feels supportive to their journey in embodying their womanhood. A transwoman on such a journey, for example, might find it beneficial to come to this workshop to get an embodied sense of the similarity or differences that HER vulva experiences in relation to cis-womens’ vulvas, and to celebrate that.
what is this for?
We live in a world where most people get their knowledge of sex and what it looks like from pornography.
Not shaming pornography here – HOWEVER, it is ONE lens on the perspective of what arousal looks and feels like.
It’s certainly not the only one. And I would argue, not the most female-affirming and presence-inducing one.
Simply put, pornography generally wasn’t designed with female arousal in mind and, more often than not, leads people to “perform” sex – that is, what they think sex SHOULD look like/feel like – while sacrificing the inner impulses that indicate what we REALLY want and need in intimate touch exchanges.
As a woman who makes love to other women, I have come to realize that its well nigh time to set straight a few myths about female sexuality and reveal truths that have been deliberately kept from us as a generally sex-negative society.
For example, even our medical institutions omit knowledge of the female genital system in their textbooks, causing confusion over things like female ejaculation and clear understanding of the clitoral complex. (if you’re wondering “what is the clitoral complex?” – this workshop is for you.)
Further, our medical establishments use names for female genitals that are misleading and stigmatizing and this, in combination with pornography only showing ONE type of vulva style, cause many people with vulvas to feel like something is “wrong” about their genitals, which can lead to debilitating insecurity around receiving oral sex, frozenness or numbness in the entire genital area, even pelvic pain.
In this workshop, you will gain a clear understanding of the female genital anatomy system and the process of arousal as it unfolds over time for most people with vulvas. You will learn specific communication skills to both guide your partner(s) and be guided. We will discuss sex toys, resources around discovering who you are as a sexual being, and we will re-frame the way you look at arousal and the significance it holds in the unfoldment of intimate play.
This is a no-nonsense, multi-layered, and considerably vulnerable experience that will include a detailed breakdown of anatomy with graphic visuals of genital systems, embodiment and movement exercises designed to get us connected to our genitals in a gentle and loving way, exercises and practices in communication skills, as well as boundaries & consent, for getting the type of touch you want, as well as a live, self-pleasure demo of the female arousal response in real time.
Due to the intimate nature of the event, participants will be limited to no more than 10-15 people per workshop.
caveats & safety
A workshop about arousal may sound fun and even frivolous, but understand this: this work is deep, and it is often quite hard. I facilitate in such a way that I don’t only teach concepts, but as a somatic sex educator, I teach people to feel and integrate these things in their bodies. Difficult emotions might come up. Grief and shame are common. Ask yourself: are you resourced enough to go this deep?
This will be a mixed gender class. There will be invitations to do partnered, intimate-but-not-sexual touch exchange with other students. Your “yes”, “no”, “maybe” and “I changed my mind” are all welcome responses to each and every exercise.
There will be no going-along. EVER.
You may opt out of each and every exercise if you so wish. You may also privately make requests to the facilitator asking to not being partnered up with specific individuals within the class with no questions asked about why you’ve made that request.
During the live demo of the female arousal process conducted by the facilitator only, the arousal of the students is welcomed in the space ( e.g. no needing to hide an erection), but students will be expected to hold an approach of reverent, silent stillness while witnessing with full attention on the demo. There will be absolutely NO student interaction during this piece of the workshop.
where is this?
Event is taking place in a private space off of Warm Springs in the east end of Boise. Participants who pay in full, leave their contact email in the notes of their payment, and sign their waiver will be given the location within 48 hours of the start of the event.
how much is this?
$125/person
**scholarships available depending on need and available spots in the workshop.
what's the sign up process?
Due to the intimate nature of this event, participants will be capped at 10-15 people per workshop.
Step One: To sign up and reserve your place in class, click here to book your spot.
Step Two: [PLEASE CHOOSE FRIENDS & FAMILY OPTION] Send $125 non-refundable class fee through Venmo @Sherika-Tenaya and in the memo please put your name, email, phone number and workshop title in the memo.
OR
You can send your fee through Paypal @ sherkamartinez@gmail.com
Once the tuition is paid and in the week before the workshop, you will receive an email with the workshop location details, group agreements to peruse before the workshop, and a waiver to sign.
Note: waiver MUST be signed and returned to Sherika no later than 48 hours before the start of the event, otherwise participant will not be able to attend and will not be eligible for a refund.
How do I make a payment?
Venmo: @Sherika-Tenaya
Paypal: Sherika Martinez | sherikamartinez@gmail.com
IMPORTANT: CHOOSE “FRIENDS & FAMILY” OPTION AND In the notes of your payment, be sure to write in the following:
- your name
- email address
- phone number
- your preferred workshop date and time.
